For 16 years, Tom Lunney cared for his wife, Nancy, through multiple life-limiting illnesses. When Nancy suffered a near-fatal heart attack, Tom found himself exhausted, overwhelmed, and unsure where to turn. What happened next changed both of their lives. 

Nancy was admitted to Ohio’s Hospice at The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center a Kobacker House, where Tom experienced something he hadn’t felt in more than a decade: Relief. 

“When you’re a caregiver, everything revolves around the patient,” Tom said. “There’s no time off. Suddenly, I didn’t have to do it anymore. The nurses showed me how to make a bed out of the couch. I laid down and went to sleep. My eyes slammed shut so hard it probably woke up 10 people. For the first time in 16 years, somebody was taking care of Nancy, and they were taking care of me, too. It gave us at least 10 more days together.” 

Those were 10 days they could spend together Celebrating Life’s Stories^®. 

“It was precious,” Tom said. “You know, really and truly was. We were able to talk about things, which is what we did all the time anyhow. We talked to each other constantly about everything.” 

What they didn’t need to talk about was if Nancy needed anything. Ohio’s Hospice was there for that. 

“It was a huge mind shift,” Tom said. “It was an automatic thing for me. Food, clothing, getting a bath because she couldn’t bathe herself. Getting her clean, just whatever it was, I had to do it. Suddenly, I didn’t have to do it anymore.” 

It was a new normal that was hard for Tom to comprehend at first. 

“I couldn’t believe it,” he said. “I’m able to describe that whole feeling very, very accurately because it’s just like it happened yesterday and it was two years ago. That’s the kind of impact that made on me. They got me through this whole thing with what was going on with Nancy. But more importantly, they got me through this whole thing so I could get with my life.” 

Tom didn’t get too far away from Ohio’s Hospice as he moved forward. After speaking with a friend from church who was a hospice volunteer, and at the suggestion of Robin LaMarre, one of the nurses – or angels as Tom put it – he became a volunteer at the Wexner IPU. 

“It was a way for me to give back,” Tom said. “It was a way for me to honor all the hard work, dedication, persistence, and the ability to be a part of the team. When I was able to come back in as a true volunteer, and the training I got, it became very crystal clear to me very quickly that I could give back, I could do this, I want to do this. I sincerely wanted to physically help the people that were in there.” 

That’s what he does for three hours every Tuesday, leveraging his hospice knowledge to help other families cope with end-of-life situations. 

“I’m able to use my experience as somebody who got the benefits of hospice care, to talk to people about the benefits that they’re going to be getting from it,” he said. “It doesn’t make it easier that your loved one is not with you anymore, but it does make it easier in that you’re able to get the help you need in order to go through this thing, and you’re not going through this thing alone.” 

He is a sympathetic and empathetic ear who can put families at ease as they prepare to say goodbye to their loved one. 

“I will tell [families], you’re going through this with some of the best people on the planet, who are taking care of you, taking care of them, and just taking care of life as it were.” 

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